The Sexless Relationship: Can You Still Have Passion When You’re Not Having Sex?
Love/Friendship Balance | August 8, 2016
The idea that sex is necessary to be able to have a passionate relationship is a belief that has been perpetuated throughout culture. With this in mind, it is easy to see why those who are in sexless relationships may feel that their relationship is suffering. However, according to Robert J. Sternberg, a prominent psychologist, sex is only a component of passion. Passion also involves a longing or yearning for your partner. In other words, those in sexless relationships can still generate a lot of passion. Here is how:
- Engage in New Experiences Together
Doing new things together as a couple can ignite a spark in your relationship. This can be as simple as going on a nightly stroll instead of catching up on everything in your DVR. New experiences can change the dynamic between the two of you and even heighten attraction (and thus, passion).
On the other hand, taking some time apart and having a life outside of your partner can also evoke this sense of longing that is crucial to passionate love.
- Maintain Intimacy with Date Nights
Remember that sex is not the only component to having a passionate, all-consuming love. Your emotional bond – and the intimacy in your relationship – is also important to feeling connected to your partner.
A good way to maintain intimacy or a sense of closeness in your relationship is to focus on having good conversation. Date nights can give you something to look forward to, which can, in turn, elevate passion. The opportunity to have uninterrupted time with your partner will also facilitate connectedness with him or her. Add an additional layer of excitement to date night by driving to your selected destination separately.
- Understand Each Other’s Needs
It is important to understand your partner’s needs and their “love language.” For example, perhaps your partner feels most content in a relationship through physical touch, such as cuddling on the couch. It is important to be aware of this in order to be able to utilize this information to evoke positive feelings and thus, intimacy.
Similarly, it is just as important for your partner to understand this about you, too. Perhaps it is acts of service, such as your partner doing the dishes.
Studies show that other factors, particularly companionate love, is a stronger predictor of relationship happiness than that of sex. That being said, passion is still very possible in relationships without sex. For more information, contact the matchmaking experts at Bespoke.